[14th April 2014]
There’s a switch inside me that flipped since Saturday. It feels a little strange to be around Ove: like a “I know, you know” sort of situation. Yet I won’t be the one to start an embarrassing conversation about my feelings to clear the air between us. I don’t know about him, but the chill “we’re just hanging out” vibe is a bit forced on my side, since all I can think about when he is around is jumping his bones. I’m not really sure what’s going on, but it’s getting hard to handle, like when I catch myself blatantly checking out his “equipment”!
I’m not sure he notices me doing it, ‘cause if he is aware of it, he’s going a fine job pretending not to see me feasting on the sight of the mound outlined through his jeans.
I’m barely aware myself! My mind just automatically starts thinking about walking over to where he is standing talking to me and shutting him up by placing the flat of my hand on the bulge of his jeans and massaging it up and down into its full hardness. In this fantasy I just assume that it is already half aroused, maybe because his junk is so visible… I’m thinking of grabbing him by his shirt collar and pulling him down to me in one of those TV-style sexy rough kisses, making him forget about the meal he’s keeping an eye on. Triggered by my actions he grabs my ass with both hands and parks me on the kitchen counter, then releasing his dewy cock he pulls my knickers aside and shoves it in. This fantasy feels so real that I tingle with goose bumps as my vagina clenches in anticipation only to feel a definite lack hard cocks inside.
I’m suddenly aware of myself and the irritating dampness of my underwear. It’s shocking that these thoughts that I’m only allowed to secretly let out at bedtime are now slipping out during the day. It just doesn’t feel right, to think these things and even to be so distracted by and attracted to Ove. I shouldn’t want to fuck a guy with such a dumpy name this much!
I’m not quite sure what to do with myself, heck, I’m not even sure how I managed to keep having a conversation while on full perv mode, let alone what I said! I’m such a stupid hoe!>ᴖ<